So, evidently my wife wants no mention of sex and her in my blog, which is understandable, because people she knows might read it, and get the wrong idea. We have never actually consummated our marriage. Marley and Jack were conceived by the Holy Ghost and Marley was born while miraculously preserving Mickelle's hymen and virginity. All of the previous mentions of sex between Mickelle and me were merely my desperate posturings at attempting to be cool in the eyes of all the devotees of the Sect of the Phoenix. She remains as virginally pure as the day she was conceived--evidently immaculately.
I repeat, I have no carnal knowledge of Mickelle Fonnesbeck Williams and she has never engaged in such ghastly behavior as coitus with me or anyone else for that matter.
Mickelle ydy forwyn i mewn 'r chreuau chan Celi