The Red Hat Society and yet another symptom of bourgeois bohemian detachment

So, I've recently become aware of a Society called the Red Hat Society. Whoa boy this is gonna be a vicious one.

Okay, so this society sprang from a poem about what a woman would do as she got older--celebrating her aging instead of striving to ignore/prevent it. She claims that she would wear a red hat with purple clothing (evidently this is fashion suicide to women) and get feistier a la Wheezer in Steel Magnolias instead of becoming the sweet kind old grandma everyone expected her to be. Someone read the poem and decided to start a club of her friends that would do just this. It has since grown into a national organization. So far I have no objections to this club.

I'm going to respond to various comments in their FAQ, [my responses will be in italics] here goes:

Are there any responsibilities?
The main responsibility is to have fun! No problem here! We see this group as an opportunity for those who have shouldered various responsibilities at home and in the community their whole lives, to say goodbye to burdensome responsibilities. So, let me get this straight, at age 50 after presumably having spent the past 25 years of their lives working and enriching themselves, they suddenly are encouraged to throw off all responsibility in favor of the self? Wouldn't it be more productive to use your later years, when you're in a more comfortable place financially to enrich the lives of others? Notice that it says "goodbye to burdensome responsibilites" and not "a getaway from or a break from". As if raising children were a burden! This is a place to have fun and enjoy ourselves. Of course, someone needs to plan the events or they would never happen, but oftentimes members take turns at these things so that they do not become "jobs" for anyone. If an individual chapter wishes to participate in charitable events or any such things, we encourage them to do so, but the Red Hat Society as a whole does not see itself as an appropriate forum for fund-raising or other such things. Charity is for the young? Charity is for other organizations? Didn't we just say that we were saying goodbye to responsibilities? The refrain of the popular Red Hat Society theme song by Mike Harline puts it rather bluntly: "All my life, I've done for you. Now it's my turn to do for me." HOLY SHIT! How can anyone seriously sing this? The women I know that join these societies are the wives of upper-middle class husbands who have not had to be employed to make ends meet. Their Official Society Sport is shopping. They have been doing for "me" since the day the first bought something for form over function, since they first got an SUV so they "could see the road better", since they first bought a house with more bedrooms by a factor of two than people in their family.

The Red Hat Society calls itself a "disorganization," and we are proud of our lack of rules and by-laws. But, much like the Punk Scene, the lack of rules will eventually become its own set of rules. Crusading against rules in a for-profit company will always lead to splinter groups and eventually a lawsuit by the parent company against a chapter for cease-and-decist or some other ill. It will happen. Rules have to exist in capitalism, especially bourgeois consumer late-capitalism. We are all helping to develop an enormous "nurturing network" for women over 50 , by joining red-gloved hands and spreading the joy and companionship we are finding within and among the chapters. We have also discovered a "mission" of sorts: to gain higher visibility for women in our age group and to reshape the way we are viewed by today's culture. I would cringe if I were a woman to think that women are seeking to be seen as eccentric and self-centered. Always remember that you are eccentric, just like everyone else. We are all familiar with militant groups of the past, which stridently sought to achieve their agendas. We're not feminist! Let's make sure that we distance ourselves from the groups that gave us the cultural freedom to go around in public the way we do. Well, we are decidedly UN-strident, but we hope to advance our agenda [which is? I've read your entire webpage and I have no idea what it is] with good humor and laughter. If we do not join together under the banner of the Red Hat Society, but rather remain isolated, unconnected groups, that will not happen. Therefore, we are working to build a disorganization within which we can all connect – and eventually take over the world! And charge dues and get rich in the process! Besides isn't world domination a bourgeois capitalist cliche? Please, try and not take over something. Truly buck the system that you don't want to be a part of anyway. Dress in conspicuous clothes and have your parties. Go shopping and gambling and divers bohemian activities and stimulate that old economy. Do nothing for others as an organization. Waste these later years and your combined power as a group by refusing to do anything to help the communities in which you reside. Why bother making the world a better place all of your life when you can dine out and gossip?


"Ode to the Red Hat Society"by Sue Ellen Cooper
I'll let it speak for itself
A poet put it very well. She said when she was older,
She wouldn't be so meek and mild. She threatened to get bolder.
She'd put a red hat on her head, and purple on her shoulder.
She'd make her life a warmer place, her golden years much golder.
We read that poem, all of us, and grasped what she is saying.
We do not need to sit and knit, although we all are graying.
We think about what we can do. Our plans we have been laying.
Instead of working all the time, we'll be out somewhere playing.
We take her colors to our hearts, and then we all go shopping
For purples clothes and hats of red, with giant brims a-flopping.
We're tired of working all the time, and staying home and mopping.
We order pies and chocolate fudge, and rich desserts with topping.
We crown ourselves as duchesses and countesses and queens.
We prove that playing dress-up isn't just for Halloween.
We drape ourselves in jewels, feathers, boas, and sateen.
We see ourselves on television and in magazines.
We laugh, we cry, we hug a lot. We keep each other strong.
When one of us goes out for fun, the rest all go along.
We gad about, we lunch and munch, in one big happy throng.
We've found the place where we fit in, the place we all belong.

We do own the rights to this poem, and we share it with our members freely. The "Ode to the Red Hat Society" may not be used on product for sale or in the promotion of product for sale except by express written permission from the Red Hat Society. HA THERE ARE RULES! PROTECT MY PROPERTY, IT'S OURS ALTHOUGH THE BASIS FOR OUR SOCIETY IS SOMEONE ELSE'S POEM!

A person obviously has the right to do whatever they want. But, can you think of any large organization that specifically discourages its members from charitable activities. The woman that I know who is a member of a chapter in Georgia told me that every year they have a vote about activities they could, and they always get voted down "even though we all go and participate anyway, just not as a chapter." Ugh! Even motorcycle gangs ride for charity. Any organization worth its salt should have at least one charity activity a year. There are so many people in the world that need help. If this were a men's organization (usually called a country club or golf tourney) I would feel the same way, save the fact that even golfers have charity tourneys.

Shopping will not make the world a better place or you feel better about yourself. Consumerism will tarnish your soul, no matter your belief in a higher power. Altruism benefits everyone, the giver and the receiver. Not saying you shouldn't have fun, but joining an organization like this is just wrong. If they had one thing a year, I could see it, but they have nothing.

The Red Hat Society members are tools of the capitalist machine and they don't even know it.

My Mom has been living the spirit of the red hat poem (not the lame Society one, but the original one) all her life by bucking the conventions of what women should be. I find it funny that now all these women that made fun of my mom her whole life are suddenly embracing the "freedom" from convention that she has known since she was young. And my Mom would be one of the first to try and have fund-raisers and charitable activities. You can be eccentric and help others and go shopping and not revel in the fact that you can revel.

BTW: Capitalism is a good thing. Losing oneself in the trappings of consumerism is very bad, worse than stealing Joeboo's rum.